My Car Has a SPECIAL Feature!

Today I am going to spend some time going through my car manual! I have looked at this before – okay I will be honest I think I flipped through it the day I bought the car and the rest of the time it is just something I move when I am digging in the glove compartment.............on a side note I DO have a pair of gloves in there!

Last night I vowed that I need to thoroughly READ and STUDY this book! I have decided that I have a special feature on my car that I was unaware of AND that I have accidentally engaged...............I am of the firm belief that my car has an INVISIBLITY CLOAK! I am not talking a Harry Potter drape it around the car cloak 

but a Romulan flip a switch and nobody can detect you cloak!

Now right now you probably think I have lost my mind or else I have been drinking (oh come on! It is 9am on a Sunday morning...........and it is not Rodeo weekend! Okay for some of you that reference went right over your head, but if you are a Stinnett Rattler or a cowboy you totally get it).

Let's go over the facts:

I drive a Kia Sportage – no it is not a Suburban but it is not a Smart Car either.........it has some size to it!

It isn't white or black – it is RED! Hello! Red Light – Stop Sign – Danger................it is RED!

I bought the car Brand New in 2007.........so I have had it for SIX years!

Let me present the evidence:

In August I rushed the car to the tire store because I had a roofing nail in the front tire – they said it would be two hours to fix the flat because the “flat” line was so long! Thank you May hail storm damage from which there are STILL houses waiting on roofs in Amarillo. When I came back to pick up the car it was parked at the side, I backed out and looked up to see a Suburban BACKING down the drive and WHAM! BIG dent in my drivers door! Driver said............”I didn't see you”

(I think I handled this one pretty calmly, turned out the driver was a former student of mine AND he worked for the tire place............his insurance is footing the bill for the repairs)

In September I was walking out of the mall and watched a man and woman walking across the parking lot between the cars. WHAM! The guy walked right into the back of my car, I heard him say to the lady, “I didn't even see that car”.

(I laughed my head off over this one, kinda made my day)

Last night I got off work, stopped by McDonald's (on Coulter, yes it was a rough night I need some cheering up). They have a two window drive up – first pay, then product. The car in front of me paid and they brought her stuff and gave it to her through the pay window. She decided it was time to leave..................you guessed it, she put it in reverse and WHAM backed right into me! What did she say....................yep -  “I didn't see you back there!”

(This one I was not so calm about at the start..........you have to understand, I have an appointment at 9am Monday morning to FINALLY get my door fixed...........yes thank you again May hail storm! But after looking at the car and realizing there was no damage I was much better)

The final result is I have decided that some way or another I have accidentally activated my cars Invisibility Cloak and now I need to spend some time figuring out how to DE-ACTIVATE it!

I think I will write KIA a letter, they should put a warning sticker on any vehicle they install this feature on!